17 Jul 2022
[By Kum. Laxmi Thrylokya]
I'm Thrylokya. Since my childhood, I was interested in learning new things and my academic grades were always high. Being proactive, I gained people's attention and I thought that it was permanent. I was in 12th standard when I lost my cousin. Until then, my aim was only to earn a luxurious life. His death had left my mind with many unanswered questions about life. I understood 2 things for sure.
1) I had to leave all my worldly achievements here once I die.
2) Nobody is going to come with me when I die.
I couldn't perform well in IIT entrance and had to join Amrita University at Coimbatore for studying B.Tech. It is established by a living Sadguru Shri Mata Amritanandamayi Devi (AMMA). There was spiritual atmosphere in my college campus. Slowly, I got to learn more about her and tried to imitate her principles in life. I found it very difficult to follow. I liked her teachings and respected her. I used to read the autobiographies of many spiritual seekers and I badly wanted to get salvation as soon as possible. I wanted to do Karma Yoga although I didn't know exactly what it meant. I was somehow convinced that I have my own Sadguru and He will come into my life. Sometimes, I couldn't sleep at night thinking about when I will meet my Sadguru. I was waiting and waiting and waiting...
I used to read the philosophies of Jaggi Vasudev, Jiddu Krishna Murthy, Osho, ISKON, Vivekananda, Ramanujacharya, Shankara, etc but I could not get convinced about any particular philosophy completely. With my limited understanding, I concluded that service without expecting anything in return is the Karma Yoga. Therefore, I decided to write IAS examination to become a public servant. I was preparing for the exam parallelly. In my 3rd year, I met a senior named Mr. Bharat Krishna who insisted me to join a Bhagavad Gita camp held in our college. I learnt certain concepts about Karma Yoga but I wasn't fully convinced with the explanation. Therefore, I was not able to implement it. I entered final year and attended a lecture on environmental studies by a new professor. His English was flawless and he seemed to have an in-depth knowledge about many things. I wanted him to be my mentor and help me crack the IAS exam. I approached him with the same intention. He questioned me why I want to write the exam. I said that I wanted to practice Karma Yoga as public servant. He replied that one cannot do Karma Yoga without Jnana Yoga. He clarified that it would be like a person trying to do surgery without studying MBBS. That example scared me. So, I asked him what was his definition of Karma Yoga. He said that Karma Yoga means serving human incarnation of God without expecting anything in return. Initially, I was scared listening to the fact that God comes in human form in every generation. It took a day to digest that fact. Next evening, I went to the professor and asked him, "Sir, how do I identify the human incarnation?". He replied that divine knowledge is the associated characteristic of a human incarnation although showing miracles is one of the identity marks. I asked if AMMA was an incarnation of God. Professor replied that God can exist in multiple human forms at the same time. My mind was blown and my heart was terrified. I thanked him externally and ran out of his cabin back to my hostel. Each time he answers me, I felt thrilled and afraid at the same time. At the end, my mind gets convinced by his logical answers. I wanted to learn more from him and asked him if he could teach me more divine knowledge. Fortunately, he said yes and Bharat Anna also joined me.
Then came the day of Guru Purnima and many students wanted to take blessings of AMMA. We all travelled to Amrithpuri from Coimbatore. That day, AMMA gave a speech that in ancient days, disciples were in search of Guru but today, Gurus are in search of good disciples. I felt very pained by those words. After the speech, I told her in my mind, "Amma, I came. You don't need to search for a good disciple. I will become your best disciple. I'll serve you all my life. Just accept me. I'll be in your ashram as Brahmacharini". I told the same to her during my personal interview-Darshan. She just laughed aloud and then looked at me smilingly. She said something in Malayalam and people translated to me. AMMA said, “You should be in Satsang and learn spiritual knowledge. You should go back to your Hometown and stay with your parents”. Immediately, I burst out crying. I felt that she was not taking me seriously. I was very much disappointed because She didn't accept me as her disciple. Slowly, I wiped my tears and walked down the stage. Afterwards, I didn't reveal this conversation with AMMA to anybody. It was my most personal secret. I didn't know the plan she has in store for me. Later on, my professor told me that Swami (my Sadguru) is staying at Hyderabad which is my home town as well.
I came back to Coimbatore and resumed learning the divine knowledge from my professor, who was none other than Dr. Nikhil Kothurkar Sir, who is an ardent devotee of Swami. He taught us all the concepts of Divine Knowledge given by Swami without revealing about Swami. I thoroughly enjoyed every Satsang and always waited for the next Satsang. While listening to the knowledge from him, I concluded that Nikhil Sir must be a human incarnation because he was the source of divine knowledge for me. But Nikhil Sir denied this conclusion saying that there was someone else who is the source of this knowledge. After 3 months, Sir revealed to us that the source of this entire knowledge is Shri Datta Swami and that Shri Datta Swami is from Vijayawada. Sir said, “The knowledge heard by you from me is just the heat of boiling water. Shri Datta Swami or Swami is the actual heater heating the water!”. I was mesmerized by this statement and continued learning the knowledge.
It was only Bharat Anna and myself who were reading the divine discourses of Shri Datta Swam one by one. At that time, there were 23 divine discourses published on the Universal Spirituality website. We read around 8 books by then. In the campus, nobody around us were willing to listen to the spiritual knowledge. Except Nikhil Sir, we don't know anyone who can support us in our spiritual journey. Sometimes, my mind used to ask if I was making a mistake by giving highest priority to this spiritual knowledge. There were friends who advised us to focus on exams, job and self-enjoyment rather than learning divine knowledge. Although we were enjoying the knowledge and completely addicted to it, we felt abandoned. One fine morning, my sister Ms. Bhanu phoned to me and asked what is meant by 'Sanaatana Dharma'. I probed where did she hear this word. I was surprised to hear that it occurred to her in her dream. She explained, "A divine couple came in my dream. They were spiritually sound and were great speakers. After their speech, they both came to our house. The holy lady is as divine as AMMA. The holy man has given me a set of books and asked me to read them. The book on the top was titled 'Sanataana Dharma' and number 23 was written on it". I immediately realized that it was Swami's doing because ‘Divine Discourses-23’ was the latest published volume of divine discourses of Swami at that particular time. I was extremely thrilled and happy that Swami is with us. We are not alone. It gave a major boost to us and there was no looking back since then. We witnessed many miracles in the following few months.
Thereafter, I graduated from college and came back to Hyderabad. I was longing to meet Swami to thank Him. Nikhil Sir helped me again to contact Swami directly. Fortunately, Swami agreed to give me darshan and my happiness had no bounds. I felt like my purpose of life is fulfilled with the meeting. With extreme excitement, I was going to Mrs. Annapurna Garu's house for Swami's darshan. I almost reached the place but couldn't identify which house it was. After wandering around hopelessly, I phoned to Swami. With climax kindness, Swami Himself came out of the house and waved hand at me signalling me to come near Him. I ran to the house and did Pādanamaskāram.
Swami was very cheerful and simple in attire. I sat on the floor near him but he insisted me to sit on the chair next to Him. From the bottom of my heart, I thanked Him for giving so much true knowledge and that too for free. I wasted a lot of money by buying many spiritual books but couldn't get the truth which was achieved by me through Swami’s divine discourses. Later, I told him that I graduated from Amrita University and Nikhil Sir sent me to him. Swami replied, "You studied in AMMA's college. It is AMMA who sent you to me. You are her recommendation candidate". I was literally blown. How could anyone know about my personal conversation with AMMA...? No chance! I didn’t reveal it to anyone. Swami must be omnipotent and omniscient. No doubt about it!! He is Lord Datta. I felt happy that AMMA didn't reject me. She accepted me and transferred me to the PhD class under Swami.
I thank our beloved Swami for giving a meaning to my life, for accepting me and my services. I wanted to become a mere public servant but Swami blessed me to become the servant of God. I am grateful that Swami also accepts hard earned money (called Karma Phala Tyaga) apart from service (called Karma Sanyasa) as told in Gita. I learnt a lot about these two concepts from Swami’s divine discourses. Swami says that first stage is theoretical knowledge as stressed by Shankara. The second stage is theoretical devotion as stressed by Ramanuja. The third stage is Practice as stressed by Madhva. The sequence of these three steps can be understood from the sequence of the arrival of these three divine preachers, Swami says so. Practice or Karma Yoga is sub-divided in to service and sacrifice fruit of work to God. Theoretical knowledge generates theoretical devotion and practice is the proof for theoretical devotion. All these are concepts of Swami and the speciality of spiritual knowledge of Swami is that none of these concepts could be heard so far and clarity of each concept is just unimaginable! God Datta alone can give such excellent spiritual knowledge.
Previously, I used to work as an online coding instructor for a meagre income. The pay was proportional to the number of classes I take per month. It was not a permanent job but it was sufficient for my needs. I was able to do Swami’s service and read divine discourses every day. Therefore, I was satisfied with it and did not try for a better paying job. One day, I was in Satsang with Swami and Swami suddenly said, “I am Lord Datta and I can give you lakhs of rupees at once. Tell me how much you want?”. I was surprised and thrilled at the same time. Swami said, “I am serious. Tell me quickly. How much do you want?”. Instantly, a series of thoughts struck my mind. I recalled the fact that Swami provides basic needs for all living creatures on this Earth including human beings. He is God who is providing food to each bird and animal every single day. So, I need not bother about my food, water and shelter anyways. Swami will take care of it. After fulfilling basic needs, the next important thing in life is to acquire true spiritual knowledge from Sadguru who is the contemporary human incarnation of God and to serve Him by doing propagation of His true spiritual knowledge. Therefore, I immediately decided to ask money to reach my Sadguru. I replied, “Swami, give me that much money which is sufficient to hire a cab and reach your place of stay.” Swami said, “That’s it.? Okay. Datta bless you” The conversation ended there and I found tears rolling in His eyes.
After few days, I was informed by a well-wisher that my resume was shortlisted for a company which is one of the great places to work in India. I was also informed that the website does not generally open at all and opens very rarely. I was also told that some 90 odd applications were pending and it is a surprise that my resume was shortlisted within no time and I was called for the interview. Generally, interview consists of 2 coding rounds and 1 HR round. But for me, the selection happened with only 2 rounds of interview. It was unbelievable. The very first round was about competitive coding but I could not prepare for it due to lack of time. By Swami’s grace, they did not ask me a single question in coding. They only questioned me about my previous work. Somehow, the next coding round was cancelled and I was invited for HR round directly. By Swami’s grace, the interviewer was already impressed with my name and that HR round was like a cake walk. Within few days, they confirmed that I got a permanent job in their company with a decent pay package. I was very happy and informed the same to Swami. Swami said, “Datta bless you.”
After nine months, my salary hike was given as 57%, which is unheard by me anywhere else so far. Recently, they even announced a ‘Platinum award’ as token of appreciation. It is just mind-boggling to witness the grace of Swami at every step of my life. Frankly speaking, I don’t deserve any of it. Without the grace of Swami, I am good for nothing. Swami is holding me and navigating my life. When I thanked Swami for giving me the hike and the award, Swami said, “Do your job sincerely. You should do the job as sincerely as you do my service because the job is also given by me only”. I thank Swami from bottom of my heart.
O Lord Datta, I only asked for a little money and You are raining wealth (Kanaka Varsham) on me. Now, I am afraid if I can handle this without getting pride and ego. I only want to learn your knowledge and serve you constantly. I don’t want anything else. If this wealth and fame try to come in between us, I beg you to remove them because I am helpless. I know that I can stand as Your devotee as long as You hold me. So, please hold me forever. Scold me and punish me but don’t abandon me. You are my only hope of life and purpose of life. Everyone around me is loving me for their own happiness but You are loving me for my own happiness. You saved my father from an accident although he is not Your devotee. You are leading a simple life because my jealousy doesn’t come on You. You are controlling my ego by giving me right knowledge at right time. You are taking my illness and suffering on Your body. You are accepting my defective services just to uplift me. To be in Your service, You haven’t given me a rule book to follow like doing rituals, taking bath in cold water, etc. You have forgiven me umpteen times for the blunders I have done. You only talk about my merits and hide my defects. I am indebted to You forever Swami. I bow down to Your lotus feet for everything You are doing for me. I cannot ask anything more from You because You have given me everything more than I ever deserve.
Thank You, Swami. I am short of words to thank you enough.
At Your Divine Lotus Feet,
Laxmi Thrylokya.
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