09 Feb 2005
[My son wants to take ‘Sanyasa’. Can You give me some advice to stop it? Since the Veda says that parents are the direct God, does he not have the responsibility of serving the direct God?]
Your name indicates that you are a follower of Adi Shankara (Smarta tradition). Shankara also left His mother, the direct God, for the sake of propagation of the knowledge of God. Why do you not criticize Shankara? But you are criticizing your son for wanting to do the same thing. Therefore, you are unaware of the truth. Father and mother are the direct God as far as this world is concerned. But once God competes with the parents, they are to be left for the sake of God. The Veda says “Matru Devah Pitru Devah” which means that parents are God as far as the world is concerned and God is the parent after God enters one’s life. Thus the word in the Veda has two meanings accepted by grammar.
If your son is leaving you due to his love for his wife, children or some other human being in the world, he should be criticized. In such a case the responsibility is broken and he will be punished. But if one leaves his parents for the love of God, it is not a sin and there is no failure of the responsibility. Therefore Adi Shankara left His mother for the sake of God. By this His mother got eternal salvation. Had Shankara stayed in that hut, He might have served His mother for this petty lifetime and that is a temporary benefit compared to eternal salvation.
If other worldly things are going to spoil your son, I can advise him to marry and settle down to serve his parents. But when he is starting the journey towards God, if anyone pulls him back, that person becomes the greatest sinner. God will be angry with him because he is not coming towards God himself and is also dragging back somebody who has turned towards God. If one is drawn towards the bad attractions of the world and is doing wrong things, you can divert him towards justice. But if one is turned towards the spiritual path, he should not be diverted to worldly justice. God is greater than worldly justice because God protects justice. If one is falling down you can bring him up. But if one is going towards the sky you should not pull him down to the earth. If one is spending time in spiritual discussions and does not feel hungry, you should not force him for meals. If he feels hungry, you can advise him to take meals and again participate in the divine discussion.
In the one-hour discussion even if half an hour goes for meals, the rest half an hour becomes fruitful in the discussion. The worst thing is to sit in the discussion with hunger and not applying the mind towards the discussion. In this case, the person wastes the entire hour. Thus hypocrisy should be avoided. Similarly instead of continuing in sanyasa with internal worldly desires, it is better to lead a married life and participate in the service of the Lord sincerely at least for sometime. Thus you can advise your son that he should not take sanyasa if even a trace of his mind is on worldly pleasures. Even after taking Sanyasa if his mind is attracted towards worldly pleasures, he should come back to household life instead of continuing in sanyasa with hypocrisy. Thus sanyasa without any hypocrisy is the best. The next best is household life. The worst is Sanyasa with hypocrisy. This is the real essence of all the Vedas. People should not misinterpret the Vedas and state that parents are God and there is no other God. If that is so then Prahlada should not have left his father. Shankara should not have left His mother. In fact cutting all these worldly bonds with parents, wife, children and money is the real salvation. The existence of the only bond with the Lord is called Kaivalyam or Sayujyam.